Together, We Can Do Anything
by Gmariam
Summary: Set during 'The Rise of Skywalker' and starting after their escape from the Steadfast, Finn and Poe work through some unresolved issues from their final mission to defeat the First Order.
1. Chapter 1

_i. leave the past behind_

"You all right?"

Poe almost didn't hear Finn enter the cockpit of the _Millennium Falcon_. His mind was a hundred parsecs away, blank one moment, then filled with a dozen thoughts the next minute, tumbling chaotically one over another and making his head pound. His reaction was late, giving too much away; he tried to smile over his shoulder, but could tell immediately that Finn wasn't buying it from another one of the exasperated looks he'd been giving Poe a lot lately.

"Fine," Poe replied with a shrug. "Been shot before. Just thinking about our next course."

Finn swore vehemently, earning a surprised look from Chewbacca in the co-pilot's seat. Apparently, he'd forgot about Poe's injury and was checking up on him for some other reason. "You got shot! Your arm—is it bad? Poe, you should get it looked at—you want me to look at it, patch it up? I can get you the—"

"Nah," said Poe standing abruptly as Finn practically babbled an apology. "I got it. You could take over up here, though. How's Rey?"

"She's fine," said Finn, frowning as he switched places with Poe and settled into the pilot's seat. "She said she needed a few minutes to herself, but to set course for Kef Bir." He turned and gave Poe a look of concern. "If you're sure you're up for it."

"'Course I am," Poe said, and he was. He had to be. A blaster burn to his arm wasn't going to stop a mission like this, not when he'd had worse, and he'd clamp down on anything else that was bothering him before they arrived. It's what he'd been doing for the last several months, after all. "Go ahead and set the course, Chewie. I'll be in the back."

He turned to leave, but Finn called him back. "Poe, you sure you're all right? Do you need anything?"

Poe plastered another smile on his face, shook his head, and left. He was pretty sure Chewie said something about him before the cockpit door closed. Let them talk about him; like Rey, he needed some time alone.

Rey was sitting on the floor on the hold, tucked into a corner with her head against the bulkhead. She looked troubled and exhausted. Poe couldn't help but watch her for a moment, thinking of what she had done on Pasaana, on Kijimi, on the _Steadfast_; kriff, she'd jumped out of the docking bay straight onto the _Falcon_. She was growing stronger every day, and he had little doubt that she could, one day, defeat not only Ren but the Emperor himself. And maybe, just maybe, they would win this thing with her on their side. End the war.

There were a hundred other things to worry about, of course, including their most immediate concern: tracking down the Wayfinder in order to find Exegol and defeat whatever Final Order forces were hiding in the Unknown Regions. No small task, and it hadn't gone well so far. Yet there was something about Rey that made him want to pull it together, to fight harder, to believe. It was something to do with the Force, no doubt, and sometimes Poe could almost imagine he felt it, strengthening him when he needed it most.

And he needed it. He thought he'd got over his doubts, moved past his mistakes and grown into his role in the Resistance, but the last few weeks had been rough. Confirming the news of the Emperor's return had shaken them all, and Poe wondered how they could possibly defeat a man who seemingly couldn't be killed. Especially when they kept running into dead ends and failures, not to mention people and places he'd prefer to leave in the past.

"You okay?" he asked Rey, much as Finn had asked him moments earlier. She opened her eyes and studied him. Poe suspected she saw more than he was offering, and felt vulnerable under her gaze, much like he did when Leia looked at him in a similar way.

"I will be," she said. "And you?"

"Someday," he said. "Maybe when this is all over and I don't feel like I'm reliving the worst days of my life over and over." His tone was light, but once again his response gave too much away.

She frowned, sitting up straighter, watching him closely. "What do you mean?" she asked. "What happened up there? Were you—" She stopped when she noticed he was holding his arm, and he half turned so she couldn't see it. "You were shot!" she exclaimed, jumping up. "Poe, your arm—"

"—is fine," he said, waving her off with his right hand. "No need for any of that fancy Force stuff. I just need to wrap it up."

"It hurts," she said matter-of-factly, as if she knew, could feel it too. Maybe she could. It hurt so much it was both numb and yet took a great effort to set it aside and keep moving, to stay focused on the mission and not curl up in agony. The heat burned into his arm, weakening his left side. He couldn't afford to be weak, not now. The mission wasn't over. Like his escape from the _Finalizer_ above Jakku, Poe had fled another Star Destroyer and had to continue with the mission, no matter how much he wanted to lay down, close his eyes, and ignore the war for a few days.

At least he hadn't crashed his ship this time.

"Everything hurts," Poe said softly, thinking of all that had happened since they'd set out from Ajan Kloss. From the moment they'd confirmed the return of the Emperor (and didn't he want to know how that was possible, when he'd grown up on stories of Palpatine's death at the hands of Darth Vader), it had been one small setback after another. The trip to Pasaana, meeting Landon Calrissian, Finn's unspoken confession in the sand pit hanging between them; then losing Chewie, meeting Zorii after all these years, his past as a spice runner distancing him and Finn even more. And of course, getting shot and captured and then escaping the _Steadfast_.

As his thoughts spiraled back to the Star Destroyer, all he could feel was panic at the thought of going through it again, of the pain and blood and torture, his mind violated at the hands of Kylo Ren, but this time with Finn by his side, suffering with him, unable to rescue him from drowning in agony this time…

Poe shook himself before Rey sensed too much. "Finn's up front with Chewie, so I'm going to go…I don't know, sit down somewhere…take it easy before we get to Kef Bir." Which was a damn lie, and she knew it; he was going to go find somewhere he could hide and suppress yet another minor breakdown so he could hold it together long enough to finish the mission. They'd all done it at one time or another. Rey looked annoyed at his deflection, yet also understanding, and he could almost swear he felt her sadness and concern as he walked away. Not for the first time, he wished he could hide things better, but he had always been someone who wore his emotions on his shirtsleeve, even when it had been singed away by a blaster.

Needing to get away more than ever, Poe headed toward the gunner's turret, thinking he'd curl up in the chair, stare into the dark reaches of space, and wallow by himself for a while. A few slow breaths, and he could put the memory of the _Finalizer_ and Kylo Ren back into the box buried deep in his mind, add the _Steadfast,_ and move on. BB-8 followed him, beeping with a sound of concern. For the third time, he tried to reassure someone he was okay when he wasn't. BB-8 called him on it, and Poe gave him a pat as he climbed the ladder and settled into the gunner's seat. He closed his eyes and let out a long shaky breath he hadn't even realized he'd been holding.

Sometimes he wasn't sure he liked what his life had become since joining the Resistance. No, since Jakku. Jakku had been the mission where it had all gone horribly wrong, when everything had changed. Oh, he'd had missions go south on him before, but not like that. An entire village killed before his eyes as he was captured by the First Order; beaten, tortured, forced to give up the one thing he'd tried so hard to protect: the map to Luke Skywalker, the last hope of the Resistance. Yes, he'd made mistakes, messed up pretty bad over the years, but those mistakes, like losing half the fleet taking out the _Fulminatrix_, or his mutiny against Admiral Holdo, had been of his own doing, his own poor choices. Kylo Ren had taken away any illusion of choice and control, invading his mind no matter how much Poe had fought him.

Yes, he'd been rescued. He'd met Finn and Finn had saved him. They had escaped together n a breathless run for freedom, only to crash into the desert of Jakku. It had been a spectacular getaway, his first time in a TIE fighter, and he'd been shot out of the sky. So captured, tortured, and shot down: a damning trifecta for a commander in the Resistance. No wonder he'd messed up and been demoted not long after, he'd been reeling. And yet he'd survived it all—the crash, the evacuation and pursuit, even the mutiny—and most importantly, he'd met Finn.

So maybe he didn't hate everything about his life since Jakku. Because that's when he'd met Finn, and then Rey, and he couldn't imagine the Resistance without either of them. He couldn't imagine his _life _without them. They'd changed him, challenged him, made him a better man. Especially Finn. Poe smiled thinking about the former Stormtrooper, the good times they'd shared, moments he held close to his heart. With Finn by his side, he'd grown so much since Jakku, since since D'Qar, and through every other mission with Finn.

It had been a hell of a year, and yet they soldiered on, continued fighting every day—recruiting, training, tracking down every lead they could and somehow surviving. Now he was on another mission to find a map, but one that would lead them to the resurrected Emperor instead of a lost Jedi. They needed to get to Palpatine and stop him before he swept out into the galaxy, before it was too late to defeat whatever forces he had marshalled in deep space. Which meant Poe couldn't be thinking about something that had happened a year ago, about Kylo Ren and being tortured for information on Luke Skywalker. He needed to get it together and focus on the mission, not worry about his past or Rey or what Finn wanted to tell her—

Wait, where did that come from? The ship jumped to hyperspace then, unexpectedly jostling Poe and sending a jolt of pain through his entire left side that made him hiss and lean back, breathing deep. He probably should have stopped to clean it, like he said he would. Some painkillers would be great too, keep him going for a while, maybe help him stay focused. Whatever Finn was going to tell Rey was between Finn and Rey, not him. He and Finn were close, best friends even, but even best friends had secrets, didn't they? Finn hadn't known about his past as a Spice Runner, after all.

Poe groaned, letting his head fall forward. He wasn't sure why Finn was so surprised about his hotwiring technique; he was a pilot and a mechanic and a member of the Resistance, where any and every skill was needed to defeat the First Order, often through deception and subterfuge. It was meeting Zorii, however, that had done him in. It had been over ten years, and she was still sore that he'd left them to make an honest living. He didn't regret it—not his time on Kijimi (aside from hurting his family) and certainly not leaving Kijimi to return home. He only regretted the others finding out, because Finn's reaction had hurt. Was he surprised? Disapproving? Disappointed? Well, he'd been a Stormtrooper, he wasn't one to talk.

Especially with secrets of his own that were only for Rey.

Poe groaned as his mind wandered down that road yet again. He knew he wasn't being fair with the comparison, like he knew Finn's secret shouldn't bother him, but it did, and he'd let it get the better of him as he'd waited to be executed on the _Steadfast_. He thought he knew what it might be, and yet at the same time he didn't think that was it since Finn had once told him it wasn't like that with Rey, so it was probably something else, something Finn didn't want Poe to know, something he could only tell Rey…which is what bothered him most. He didn't want to know what it was as much as he wanted Finn to trust him, to tell him.

_Maybe he needed to tell her first,_ the logical part of his mind whispered to the part that was still hot about it. That same voice reminded him that he hadn't told Finn about his past with the Spice Runners before they'd gone to Kijimi, so maybe he was equally at fault and should drop it, get over it and not think about what was actually bothering him with Finn, because they were in the middle of a war and those kinds of thoughts and feelings were not appropriate and would probably never work out anyway—

"Get up." A firm voice interrupted his internal rambling and he turned to find Finn on the bottom rung of the ladder. "We need to treat your arm." His mouth was set, but there was worry in his dark eyes, and something else, which Poe didn't like seeing and turned around to ignore.

"I'm fine, buddy," Poe said, hoping his easy tone hid his pain and confusion. Finn reacted with unexpected anger.

"Like hell you are!" he snapped. "I can feel—" He stopped. "I can tell you're in pain. Get up and let me fix it."

"Kriff, will you leave me alone if I do?" Poe muttered, almost a little frightened by this side of Finn. He'd seen it before, but rarely aimed at him, and he felt the shame of his past contributing to Finn's ire and hated it. He didn't know what to do about it; his past was a part of him, but it was over, he wasn't that man anymore.

When he turned around, the look around Finn's eyes had softened. "Maybe," he said softly. "If you talk to me."

He climbed back up the ladder and Poe bit his tongue, that he wasn't about to spill his guts to Finn if the other man held back as well. That didn't seem fair, and besides, Poe didn't want to talk about it anyway. About anything—not his past showing up to haunt him now, from Zorii and Ren and Jakku, to his ridiculous fixation with Finn and his secret. No, they could talk about Kef Bir, about Palpatine (how again?), about meeting Lando Calrissian, legendary hero of the Rebellion. Anything else.

Heading back to the hold, Poe followed Finn's direction to sit on the bench by the dejarik table. Rey was gone, probably in the cockpit now, and Finn had already got a medpack and laid it out. He motioned at Poe to take off his shirt. Poe smirked; Finn rolled his eyes and then waited without another word. Poe did as he was told, but it was hard: his whole arm was sore, and the shirt sleeve stuck painfully to the bloodied skin. Finn winced as Poe let out a shaky breath, then it was off, and the wound clear to see.

It wasn't as bad as it could have been – not a direct hit, anyway—but it had taken several layers of skin, leaving the layers beneath raw and oozing, with dried blood and charred skin around the edges. Poe suddenly didn't want to look and turned his head away, feeling lightheaded even though he'd seen dozens of blaster injuries in his time.

"All right?" Finn asked, and Poe nodded without speaking. No, not really, he'd been shot in the arm and it hurt; at least he hadn't been tortured, but he wasn't about to say that. Finn cleaned the wound as carefully as he could, put a spray bandage over it, and stepped back, arms folded over his chest. He watched Poe pull on his shirt and tie a strip of fabric over the hole in the sleeve.

"Thanks," said Poe, stretching his arm at the shoulder. It already felt better, though he knew he'd need more treatment whenever they caught a break, otherwise it would scar. Then again, a scar would remind him of yet another escape from a Star Destroyer; maybe he should start tattooing a tally on his shoulder or something.

"You're welcome," said Finn. "Hopefully we won't all take the brunt of it now. So what else is wrong?"

"What do you mean, what else is wrong?" Poe tried to bluff his way out. "I was captured, shot, and almost executed on a Star Destroyer, isn't that enough for one day?" He waved his arm and grimaced; too much.

"I've seen you go through worse, Poe, and come out the other side without brooding about it."

"I wasn't brooding, I was—" Poe started, but Finn stopped him.

"You were sitting alone in the dark, brooding like kicked Porg. What's wrong?"

They stared each other down, until Poe looked away, unable to continue. Finn didn't know it, didn't believe it, but he was stronger than most of them, and especially Poe. His unwavering trust, loyalty, and growing confidence shone like a beacon, growing brighter every day. It was so much like Rey, though it was a different kind of light, the kind that drew people in, drew Poe in, made him want to be better, so that he was worthy of even knowing someone so good as Finn, let alone anything more. He shook his head, his starry-eyed thoughts too much right then.

"Fine," he finally said, and he looked anywhere but at Finn. "It's been a rough few days. Lots of connections to my past I'd rather not be revisiting."

"Like Kijimi?" Finn asked, and though he tried to keep his voice neutral, Poe could hear both the curiosity and the accusation and ignored both.

"Like the _Finalizer_," he said, his words coming out harsher than he intended. He rubbed a hand over his eyes. "Kriff, Finn—last time I got captured and hauled up to a Star Destroyer, I went through some pretty bad stuff. And all I could think about this time was going through it again, except with you…you and Chewie," he added. "No heroic Stormtrooper rescue, not this time."

"Just Hux," murmured Finn, and Poe matched his grimace.

"We were lucky. And this whole thing with Palpatine returning—Finn, he died thirty years ago! What the hell is he doing back? If he can return from the dead with some sort of secret Sith fleet, how we will ever defeat him?"

Finn motioned at him to move over, then sat down next to him, their legs touching. Poe half wanted to drop his head to Finn's shoulder and sigh; he was tired and sometimes he wanted so much more from life than running from system to system, cobbling together a coalition to defeat the First Order. And too often what he wanted involved Finn.

"Poe." Finn was talking, his voice animated in that inspiring way he had but didn't know he had. "We will stop him. I don't know how and I don't know when, but we will win this. Because we're right. I've seen what the First Order does, and I've seen what the Resistance is fighting for, and I know, more than anything, that we are right, and we will win."

Poe swallowed thickly. "I know," he said. "And I'm sorry, I'm not losing hope, I'm really not. But it feels so much like last time—searching for the map to Luke Skywalker, getting caught by the First Order—"

Finn shook his head and stopped him. "You weren't tortured, we got away, we haven't crashed—" Poe laughed, since he'd had the same thought "—and we're not going to crash on some desert planet. We found the map to Luke Skywalker, and we'll find this one. And then we go to Exegol and finish this."

"I know," Poe whispered, letting his eyes slip closed. "Live in the moment, look to the future, leave the past behind."

"I like that," said Finn. "Did Leia say that?"

"No, just me," Poe admitted. "Seems as good a motto as any most days."

Finn gazed at him with something like wonder, sending warmth through Poe's body. "It's pretty good, you know. Although, I wouldn't mind looking back at a certain Spice Runner's past."

Poe groaned and shook his head. "It's not nearly as exciting as you think."

"Oh no," said Finn, and now he was grinning. "I bet it's exactly what I think. Poe Dameron, dashing smuggler, hotwiring skimmers across the galaxy and charming mysterious women in masks everywhere."

A slightly hysterical laugh escaped Poe's mouth before he stuffed a fist in it. "Oh buddy, it was nothing like that." Finn simply raised his eyebrows and waited for more, and Poe couldn't deny him. Never could, and probably never would. "Look, I ran away from home when I was sixteen. I was part of the crew for a few years, picked up some useful skills and contacts. But it wasn't for me, so I left—and they were livid. But I went home, I joined the New Republic Navy, and then I joined the Resistance. And I never looked back, not once."

Finn studied him thoughtfully before nodding. "You're right, it's not what I thought. I figured you were some kind of intergalactic flyboy."

"Oh, I was," Poe said with a grin. "Still am. But I also remembered who I was deep down, where I came from, and I went home, turned things around. And now I'm here, where I'm supposed to be."

"And now you're here," Finn echoed. He nodded again. "I'm glad you left them. This is definitely where you belong. Where we both belong." He took Poe's hand, resting on the table top, and squeezed before releasing it. "Thank you for telling me."

"I wasn't trying to keep it from you," Poe said. "It was a long time ago."

"I know," said Finn. "I get it, I do."

"Then you know you don't have to keep anything from me?" Poe asked before his brain could make his mouth stop. He regretted it immediately, knew he was going to ruin the moment, but maybe he'd feel better by saying something. Especially if Finn shared with him.

"I'm not," Finn replied. He seemed genuinely confused, and Poe turned toward him, leaned forward, lowered his voice.

"Finn...I don't know what you need to tell her, and I know it's none of my business." Finn's eyes flashed with annoyance, and Poe held up a hand in defense. "I'm sorry I brought it up on the Star Destroyer, honestly. I just want…you don't need to hide anything. If you want to talk about it, I can listen. I can help."

Finn started to frown, something like fear flickering briefly in his eyes, before he dropped his head and took a deep breath. When he looked back up, he met Poe's eyes, and the fear was gone. He even smiled.

"I know," he said. "I know you want to help, and I'm not trying to hide anything, but there's something I need to figure out before I tell…well, anyone."

"Except Rey." Poe was an idiot, and yet sometimes he couldn't help it. Especially when it came to this sort of thing. Finn and feelings and figuring them out.

Finn blew out a frustrated breath. "It's not what you think," he said. "Because I know what you think. It's just something she's uniquely qualified to understand."

Poe tried not to feel disappointed, tried to be understanding, but he was faking it. He didn't understand and it hurt and he didn't want to think about why it hurt so he nodded and forced a smile and hoped it worked. "All right. Fair enough. I'm here if you need me, though."

Finn put his hand on Poe's forearm, warm and welcome, a connection Poe hoped they never lost. "Thanks," he said. They sat in a more comfortable silence for a moment, until Finn bumped him on the shoulder again. "Want to play?" he asked, motioning at the table. "No cheating Wookies this time."

Poe looked at the board, thought about it, and shook his head. It would probably be a good distraction, but he didn't feel up to it after so much talking. "Actually, I'm starving. What do we have to eat around here?"

"No idea, let's go look. A drink would be great too."

"I don't think Kef Bir is going to have many cantinas," Poe said.

"Good thing I've got a bottle of Corellian brandy under my bunk then," Finn replied, flinging an arm around Poe.

"Brilliant," laughed Poe. "I am so glad we got off that first Star Destroyer together." It was something he thought about all the time, had said once or twice, and meant more than anything at that moment. He couldn't imagine doing any of this without Finn by his side. Together, they could do anything.

"Still the best day of my life," said Finn, laughing with him, honest and open.

_Mine too,_ thought Poe, but he didn't say anything. They found the brandy and toasted another escape, and Poe started to put his past behind him once more. The _Falcon_ continued toward the ocean moon of Endor, where the ruins of the Death Star waited to reveal the path to Exegol, and their last hope of victory.

* * *

Author's Note:

I like reading about things that might have happened in the context of the story—missing moments, small scenes and interactions that fill in the gaps and help us explain or understand things that were left out. This story is canon and explores three such scenes, starting with the revelation of Poe's past as a Spice Runner (unnecessary, but now canon, so let's make it into something we can live with, right?) and Finn's reaction to it. The second chapter focuses on what Finn was going to tell Rey and his harsh words to Poe on Kef Bir. The final chapter wraps it up after they return to Ajan Kloss following the Battle of Exegol. I've seen the movie twice and done a lot research, but desperately hope I've not mucked up any details. I hope you enjoy this slightly deeper look into the story and the relationship between Finn and Poe—which may not be canon, but could be and should be. Thank you for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

_II. look to the future_

Finn wandered the base, his heart breaking in his chest. He could feel the grief around him, like a grey fog that smothered the base with sorrow. General Organa was gone and the Resistance was in shock. Everyone looked lost, moving slowly with downcast eyes, some wiping at tears, some with blank looks of hopelessness.

Chewbacca was inconsolable. He had known Leia longer than any of them, had been with her and Han and Luke from the beginning of the downfall of the Empire, and now he had lost them all. Finn couldn't even begin to imagine the Wookie's anguish, what he must be feeling or how he would continue.

And then there was Poe, whose relationship with the general was so complicated: surrogate son, commanding officer, friend, and protégé. Finn had felt Poe's profound sadness and pain as it swept over him at the news. It had been over an hour since they had landed and Poe had walked away without a word, and Finn was worried about him. Rey had left and they'd lost Leia and all around them hope seemed lost. But even more than that, Finn worried that he had irreparably harmed their relationship, at a time when they were going to need one another's support more than ever.

He hadn't meant to snap at Poe on Kef Bir, but his frightened worry had spilled over, overwhelming him as he'd somehow felt Rey's confusion, her anger, her fear. Finn hated feeling helpless more than anything in the world: he needed to be able to act, to help, to do _something_, and not being able to help Rey had left him shaken. He was angry—at her, at Ren, at the Emperor. And then he'd taken it out on Poe.

_You have no idea what she's fighting._

_And you do?_

_Yeah, I do. And so does Leia._

_Well, I'm not Leia._

_That's for damn sure._

Stars, Finn hated himself, wished he could take it all back. He would make it right, though, somehow. Poe needed him now, and he needed Poe. He cared too much about the pilot to let something like this end their relationship. Poe was his best friend, and more. He had saved Finn, given him a name, and then a purpose and a home. They were a team, and Finn couldn't imagine his life without Poe by his side.

He ignored the small voice in his head that did a double take at the long-term implication of such thoughts, and instead focused on how he was going to fix the immediate situation. The answer was simple: honesty. Finn hated keeping things from Poe. They had come between them too many times now, and he needed to tell him everything. He'd wanted to talk to Rey about it first, but Rey was gone, and Poe was upset, and Finn didn't want to lose them both.

He found Poe sitting under a tree not far from the _Falcon_—secluded for private grief, but within a reasonable distance to remain in contact. His knees were up, his head back against the trunk, his injured left arm laying over his chest. His eyes were closed, and if Finn hadn't known better, he'd think Poe was simply exhausted and taking a quick nap, but he could feel the sorrow surrounding the other man.

Sitting down next to Poe uninjured arm, shoulders touching and grounding him with familiar warmth, Finn let the silence settle. He wanted to apologize, to tell Poe everything, but he wasn't sure where to begin. Poe beat him to it.

"I can't believe she's gone," he murmured, his eyes still closed.

Finn reached out and took Poe's hand, needing the contact, to feel connected. "I'm so sorry, Poe. I know how much she meant to you."

"You mean, how much she meant everyone, to the Resistance," Poe replied, opening his eyes and turning toward Finn with a dead look in them. "She _was_ the Resistance, Finn. She built it, she lead it, she inspired it." He turned away. "I'm not sure how to go on without her."

"We'll figure out how," Finn said. "Because we will go on, Poe. We have to. She wouldn't want us to give up now—she wouldn't want _you_ to give up."

"Well, she's not here to slap me," Poe said. "And I'm not sure it matters what I do anyway. I'm not her, Finn. You said it yourself. I'm not Leia, and I never will be." He dropped Finn's hand and curled his fingers into fists, his jaw tightening. Finn flinched internally, because this was his fault, he had done this hurt to Poe, and he wasn't sure how he could fix it now that Leia was gone.

"Poe, I…" Deep breath. "I'm sorry I said that, I really am. It was wrong of me, it was hurtful, and it was—"

"True," Poe interrupted, his voice bitter. "You don't need to apologize for pointing out the truth."

His words stabbed Finn in the gut, knowing he had hurt Poe so much. He shook his head, wished Poe would look at him, but his eyes were closed again, tighter now, as if holding back tears.

"It's not the truth," Finn said. "At least, not in the way I meant it at the time, or the way you're thinking now."

That got the other man to react. He opened his eyes, gave Finn a skeptical look, and then gazed out at the trees. After a moment he spoke, and this time his voice was flat, when it was normally so expressive. "And how exactly did you mean it at the time?"

"Look, at the time I was upset, but that's another story, another apology." And Finn was more determined than ever to tell that story, make that apology. "You may not be Leia Organa, General of the Resistance, but that's because you're Poe Dameron, our best commander, our best pilot, our best hope."

Poe immediately shook his head. "Nope, not me. I'm no one's hope. That's Rey, remember?" There was the bitterness again.

"She's one person," Finn told him. "And she's fighting her own battles somewhere. You, you're our commander now, Poe. Leia wanted you to lead after her, you know that. And you can do it, you just have to believe it."

"You know, for a guy who's usually kind of inspiring, that was pretty bad." Poe looked away and was silent.

"Sorry." Finn dropped his head, tried to focus and gather his thoughts. "Okay, what I'm trying to say is, we don't need you to be her. Stop comparing yourself to her. She never flew a plane like you, fired a blaster like you, talked back like you. Well, maybe that last. But she had her strengths, and you have yours. We need your strengths now, and they are going to be as good as hers ever were."

Poe glanced sideways at him. "Still don't believe you." But his tone sounded less bitter, and Finn felt a glimmer of hope that maybe he was getting through.

"Fine, _I_ need your strengths now. I can't do this without you, you know. You brought me into this mess, and I'm sticking with you to the end. So you can't give up, because I do not want to end up smuggling spice through some dirty spaceport in the Outer Rim."

That got a small smile. "Smuggling was never my thing. It was always about the flying." The smile disappeared. "How do I keep flying now?"

"Why wouldn't you?" Finn asked, genuinely confused. "It's what you're best at, what you were born to do, Poe! There's no reason why you can't lead from the cockpit. And you've got all the support you need on the ground. Right next to you."

This time Poe reached over, took his hand and squeezed it, left it perched on Finn's knee. "Thanks, buddy. I appreciate it."

"You better believe it," Finn told him, giving him gentle push to the shoulder. They fell silent again, but it was a more comfortable silence, touched less by anger and hurt and more by shared grief. Yet Finn still had to finish what he'd come to say, to be honest, and hope it didn't ruin everything.

"So that other thing, the other apology I owe you…" He trailed off, waiting for Poe to respond.

"Would that be for skimming off to the Death Star with a beautiful woman you just met?" he asked, his voice both lighter and annoyed. "Leaving me stuck behind with a bunch of droids and a very worried Wookie?"

"Actually, no, although it does have something to do with that, I guess." He took another deep breath. Sharing was hard sometimes, even with Poe. They'd had some good talks over the year they'd spent building up the Resistance and had grown closer and more open, but nothing like this. Finn felt more vulnerable than he ever had, all his reasons for wanting to talk to Rey first making more sense than ever. What if Poe hated him, never wanted to see him again? What if Poe was scared of him?

"I know it bothered you, that thing I wanted to tell Rey," he began, then help up a hand when Poe started to interrupt. "And I know you said it was okay, that you understood. But you don't, because I haven't told you, and I only hope you won't hate me when I do."

"I could never hate you, Finn," Poe murmured, then offered a crooked grin. "No matter how many beautiful women you run off with."

"Will you stop with the running off?" Finn demanded. "I'm not running off with anyone. And if I do, it's only if one of them can help me—help me figure out how to use the Force." There. He'd said it. And this time Finn closed his eyes, so he didn't have to see the look on Poe's face.

After a few pounding heartbeats of silence, Poe spoke. "The Force?" Finn opened his eyes and nodded.

"I think I'm Force-sensitive."

Another silence. "And that's what you wanted to tell Rey?"

"She's the only one who would know for sure, who understands what it feels like, who could tell me…" He trailed off and sighed. "Especially now that Leia's gone."

Poe was quiet, and when Finn looked at him, he found the other man gazing pensively into the woods. He didn't seem upset, but thoughtful, which was a good sign, yet Finn needed to be sure.

"You're not mad at me? For the Force thing?"

A quick turn brought them face to face. "What?" Poe exclaimed. "How could I be mad at you because you're Force-sensitive? Finn, why would you think that?"

Finn let his head fall back against the tree truck a little too hard. "I don't know! I guess I thought that maybe…especially after what happened with Ren…"

Poe sighed and leaned his head back as well, so that the tops of their heads were touching against the tree trunk. "Finn, Rey uses the Force all the time and I don't hold it against her. She's a bit scary sometimes, but I think that's just Rey. The Force itself is amazing, I grew up hearing stories about it, and that you can sense it…that's amazing, too."

"Really?"

"Really." Finn could sense Poe frowning, though. "What I don't understand is why you didn't want to tell me."

"You never told me about being a Spice Runner," Finn pointed out, and then cringed when he realized how ridiculous it sounded. Fortunately, Poe rolled his eyes as he called Finn on it.

"That's completely different and you know it. That was over ten years ago, and I didn't hide it, it just never came up. I'm sure it would have come out eventually, but it's not who I am now, so I don't think about it."

"You're right," Finn said softly. "It's different. I know you've accepted my past, and I accept yours. I guess I was worried that you wouldn't like who I am now—Force-sensitive former Stormtrooper."

"You are also my friend," Poe said, his voice equally as soft. "My best friend. I wouldn't throw that away because you can float rocks."

"I can't float rocks," Finn replied. "At least, not yet."

"Good skill to have," Poe replied, and he bumped Finn's shoulder. "Plus maybe you'll get a lightsaber. If I didn't love my X-wing, I might be jealous."

"Don't be," Finn said. "I can't do half the things you can do, especially in a ship." He paused and made his last confession. "And it's terrifying."

Again Poe looked at him in surprise. "Why is it terrifying? Finn, you have the chance to do something extraordinary, be a part of something…something legendary. That's incredible!"

"And terrifying," Finn repeated. "Because what if…what if I end up on the wrong side, like Kylo Ren? He had a good family, trained for years with Luke Skywalker, and look what happened. I grew up in the First Order. I didn't have a family, I didn't even have a name! What if all that comes back? What if it turns me?"

"Not gonna happen," Poe said, and he turned his entire body toward Finn, leaned in close with an earnest intensity that made Finn's heart speed up. "I _know_ you, Finn, and the fact that you're even thinking about it, that you're scared of it, means it won't happen. Deep down, you're too good. You care so much, it's not possible." He gave Finn one of those crooked, lip-biting grins. "And if it helps, I won't let it happen. I'll be there every step of the way, even holding your hand if you need me to."

Finn grabbed Poe's hand and held tight. "I might, and I'll hold you to it." And he meant it. He needed Poe to support him as much as he needed Rey to guide him. And even if he didn't learn about the Force, he would still need Poe, because he couldn't imagine his life any other way, with anyone else by his side.

Poe looked surprised at Finn's intensity, glancing at their hands, then away. When he turned back, he was sad once again. "Then we have to make it through this, buddy," he said quietly. "Together."

Finn nodded over the sudden lump in his throat, because he knew exactly what Poe meant. He stood, pulling the other man with him against his protests and enveloping him in a fierce hug. "We will," he said, his face against Poe's ear. It was all he could do to keep from pressing a kiss to Poe's warm skin. "I know we will, because together, we can do anything."

Poe dropped his chin to Finn's shoulder with what felt like a small laugh, or maybe a short sob. But Finn knew it was true, for as long as Poe was there with him, he would continue to fight, to hope, and to believe.

"Have you seen her yet?" Finn asked softly, reluctantly stepping back. Poe shook his head, a look of fear flashing in his eyes, and Finn took his hand once more. "Come on, it's time. You should see her, and I'll check on Chewbacca_."_

Poe nodded and held tight to his hand. It was warm and comforting and Finn was so glad the other man didn't let go. "You're a good man, Finn. Sometimes I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Probably brood too much," Finn said, tempering it with a smile. "Get in a lot more fights. Or run off half-cocked and get yourself shot."

A sharp bark of a laugh escaped from the other man, a welcome sound in the midst of so much sorrow. "Wow, don't hold back, buddy."

"I won't," said Finn. "Not anymore." At least, for the most part. What had Leia said once? _From a certain point of view. _

Poe dropped his hand and rubbed at his injured arm. "I meant what I said before." His voice was quiet now, more serious. "About making it through this, together." He cleared his throat as if he was embarrassed. "Because there's so much more than this, you know? Than fighting and running and losing people over and over. It shouldn't be like this."

"It won't be," Finn said, wondering what Poe wanted from life after the war, when the fighting finally ended and the hard job of rebuilding began. Would he keep flying, or become a politician, or settle down somewhere and start a family, live out his life in quiet peace after all he'd done to win it for others?

Somehow Finn couldn't imagine Poe grounded and without his X-wing; he was born to be a pilot and the galaxy needed him to fly. As a family man, yes—he'd talked about his own parents as former Rebels, settling on Yavin IV to raise a family, and from the tone in his voice when he talked, Finn could tell it was something special, something Poe might want someday. As a politician…maybe. Poe knew how to charm people and could be fantastic at brokering deals between the fractured planetary governments of the galaxy. Yet he'd probably get bored of politics quickly, and quite possibly start another war with some brazen comment he thought was funny.

Then again, Poe had grown in the last year, moved past his mistakes and matured, and he'd proved himself over and over as a strong and capable leader. Yes, he led difficult missions on the ground and in the air, but he could be a leader in peace, too. Finn had watched as Poe accepted his role in the Resistance, earning the wisdom only experience—sometimes harsh, painful experience—could bestow in making hard decisions. Poe could do anything, be anything he wanted.

What did Finn want, then? To help rebuild the worlds the First Order had torn down? To experience a normal life, all those things he'd never seen and done growing up as a Stormtrooper? Learn the Force? They all seemed right, each one a life he wanted to live; but more than anything, he wanted—no, _needed_—to be by Poe's side, whatever he did.

Leading the end of the Resistance and rebuilding the Republic; exploring the galaxy and learning the Force—hell, Poe had promised to even _hold his hand_ through that last, and Finn was absolutely going to hold him to it. Maybe he'd even tag along to Yavin IV, if Poe didn't mind. Sometimes a life like that sounded pretty good, settling down with someone you cared about and wanted to be with for the rest of your life. Finn still had a lot to do, but he wanted that life, too.

"It won't be like this, not forever," said Finn, and he said it as much to convince himself as to reassure Poe. "I want to see this something more you're talking about."

"Me too," said Poe. "So I guess we'd better win."

"We will, Poe. We will."

Poe smiled, not his bright pilot's smile, and not the tight, forced one Finn hated seeing, but a small, warm, and genuine smile that Finn liked to think was only for him. "Together, we can do anything," Poe murmured.

Finn's heart swelled, filled with unexpected hope for the days ahead, even at a time of such loss. With Poe by his side, they would mourn Leia, then find Exegol and defeat the Final Order. Together. And when it was over, Finn knew exactly where he would be.

* * *

Author's Note:

I have no problem with these two things—Poe's unexpected (though unnecessary) past or Finn's big revelation for Rey (which I totally dig!) One was a surprise, the other not as much. But both were left unresolved! It was obvious that both men had issues—Finn was surprised (and probably hurt at not knowing) about Poe's past, and Poe was bothered (and probably hurt at not knowing) about Finn's secret. And while the latter was glossed over with humor (_You were a Spice Runner? You were a Stormtrooper? Were you a Spice Runner? Were you a Scavenger? I mean, we can do this all night),_ the former was never even revealed to Rey, let alone Poe and the rest of the audience. So yes, it's disappointing, which is why there is fanfiction. We can finish what was started. And the same goes for Finn and Poe's relationship. Thanks again for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

_III. live in the moment_

The battle of Exegol was over, and somehow, through some miracle of fate and the Force, they'd survived. The Resistance had won.

Poe stood amongst the chaos of the returning starships, pilots and gunners and fighters running everywhere—hugging, kissing, cheering, crying. He gazed around and soaked it in, the exhilaration of success swirling around him and intermingling with the grief of their losses. He could feel it as a living thing, the spirit of victory touching each and every heart before moving on to the next. He breathed it in, let it fill him, then smiled to himself, and began to walk. He needed to find someone.

He should probably seek out Karè, or Connix, or Calrissian. And Rey. But he needed to see Finn before anyone, to see with his own eyes that the other man was alive, had survived not only the daring attack on the Star Destroyer, but that insane fall to the _Falcon._ He'd contacted the ship once during the flight back to Ajan Kloss, and though the sound of Finn's voice whooping with joy had calmed his racing heart, still he needed to _see _him. Feel him.

And finally, there he was, looking around as if he too were searching for someone. Finn's face lit up and his eyes smiled when he spotted Poe, and Poe hoped that it was for him. Each of them moved faster, ignoring everyone around them until they crashed into one another and embraced. Poe could have held onto him forever, his free hand curling around Finn's head and pulling him close.

They didn't say much—what was there to say? They had survived when all the odds had been against them, returned home alive to celebrate a hard-won victory together. There had been times—from the moment they'd arrived to face the vast Sith fleet, to the moment Poe had watched Finn dangling off the side of a falling Star Destroyer—that Poe had thought they'd never make it, that he would never see Finn again. Yet here they were, and Poe didn't want to let go. Ever.

Too soon they stepped back, and by unspoken agreement they moved through the crowd together, looking for the one person who had truly saved them that day. They walked close, arms touching, hands constantly brushing against one another as if for reassurance. They were searching for the girl who had fought the Emperor and destroyed the Sith—the last Jedi, or perhaps the first of the new.

And then she was there, battered and bruised and they were all embracing, laughing and crying at the same time. Finn had his arms around them both, and Poe took Rey's hand, and without thinking he buried his face in Finn's neck once more, as close as he could, breathing him in. He placed a kiss to Finn's neck as he did, unthinking and uncaring, whispering words of gratitude to whatever deity had granted them this moment. His heart wanted to burst from the relief he felt that Finn—that all of them—had survived to see this victory together. He never wanted it to end.

And yet it did, as others demanded their attention. They untangled themselves, and Poe thought Finn might have given him a funny look as he rubbed his neck, but then Rose was there, and Jess, and Suralinda, and the hugs continued, mingled with tears, as more and more ships landed and the exhausted Resistance tumbled out to rejoice.

Poe found Chewbacca with Lando and Wedge Antilles, Snap's former mentor. Which was when it really hit him that Snap was gone—he hadn't come back with the survivors, and he never would. He'd died doing what he loved and gone down a hero, leaving behind a heartbroken family. Suddenly the noise around Poe was too loud, the cheers all wrong. It was a celebration marred with grief, and Poe knew then how his parents must have felt after the Battle of Endor.

He watched the crowds, nodded to Zorii, and slowly walked away from the celebration and into the quiet forest, where he followed a path along a small creek. He let his mind wander between victory and loss, between sorrow and pride, between the relief he felt that it was over, guilt over so many friends lost on his watch, and the growing fear of what came next. Eventually the path ended in a large clearing, where he gazed up at the ships still coming in to join them, some of them showing off and throwing out sparks and fireworks. Finally, he turned back, knowing he would have to face the consequences of their victory, both good and bad. He was tired, but he was a general, and his job wasn't over yet.

But it could be, and maybe soon. He stopped and sat down on a nearby log, thinking about his future. He was a pilot, a fighter, and if the fighting was over he was less use to the Resistance. They would need different kinds of leaders, politicians and planners, people who could help rebuild a galaxy in peace, not war. Finn could do it, but Poe didn't want to leave Finn in charge by himself. He didn't want to leave Finn at all. Together they could do anything, but did that include rebuilding the New Republic?

Did it include a life together after the war?

Poe wanted it, now that it was over, but Finn…Finn had so much to do, so much to give. Poe couldn't hold him back, not from rebuilding, from learning the Force, from whatever he wanted to do now that the world was set right again. Besides, Finn might not want what Poe wanted, a bit of quiet normal in a chaotic life, that special something his parents had found even in the midst of war and shared for a short time in peace. Finn had grown up in a different world, isolated in the First Order; maybe he wanted to explore the galaxy before settling down.

Taking off the ring he wore around his neck, Poe smiled, ran his finger over it, and gazed into the trees, reminded of his home on Yavin IV. "We did it, mom. We did it _again_, and I was a part of it. And it was amazing, but also horrible. Because we won, but at what cost…so many people, never coming home. And what do we do now? What do we do when it's all over?" He was whispering to ghosts on the wind, and didn't expect an answer.

"Live in the moment, look to the future, leave the past behind," said a voice behind him, causing him to jump and almost drop his mother's ring. He turned to find Finn standing there grinning. "Got you, didn't I?"

Poe turned away with a grumble. "Thanks. I was sort of having a moment there."

"I know, I'm sorry," Finn said, sitting down next to Poe. "I didn't mean to spoil your moment."

"It's fine," Poe told him, placing the chain over his head and tucking it back into his flight suit. "It was probably overdramatic anyway."

"Maybe a little," Finn agreed, still grinning. They were silent for a moment, until Poe spoke again.

"What're you doing out here? Celebrations already over back at the base?"

"I think they're just beginning," Finn told him. "We should probably organize something more formal. Isn't that what usually happens after big victories?"

Poe sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. "I guess so. And we're in charge, so it's up to us."

"Planning a big party has got to be easier than what we pulled off today," Finn pointed out, and Poe laughed.

"Anything sounds easier than what we pulled off today," he said, and Finn nodded in agreement.

"We did it, though. We actually did it."

"I still can't believe it," said Poe. "All of it—getting there, you taking down that Star Destroyer, Lando showing up with an entire fleet of ships. Rey." He shook his head in wonder. "She's the one who really did it, you know. We couldn't have done anything without her."

"Well," said Finn, looking both proud of her and disgruntled; Poe loved the contradictions in this man. "I don't know. She took out the big bad guy, but we took out a hell of a lot of ships."

"Yes, we did," Poe murmured. "And we lost a lot of our own doing it." He knew It would be hard to reconcile the losses with the victories—it always was—but this was different. This was the _Fulminatrix_ all over again, his fault that so many friends and allies would never see what they had fought so hard for. Leia, and Snap, and Nien, and people he'd never even met who had come to fight for what they believed in, but would never see it realized.

Finn reached over and took his right hand. Poe kind wished he'd stop doing it, because he liked it. A lot. He rolled his eyes—he had to continue the pretense, after all—but Finn gave him that look he had, the _stop it you know you I'm right_ look, and Poe squeezed his fingers in acknowledgement. Yes, Finn was right, he did want to hold hands, even on Pasaana. Yet he had to keep up the reluctant front, or Finn would know how Poe really felt.

"I'm sorry about Snap," Finn said quietly. Poe could feel the sympathy and sincerity rolling from the other man, wrapping around him, calming him. Finn had always done that for Poe, and Poe wondered if it was the Force, one of Finn's many gifts now given name. "I know he was a good friend."

"One of the best," Poe said, his voice surprisingly steady. "I've known him for years. He had a crazier life than me, but he died doing what he wanted to be doing. Leia would have been proud."

Finn was silent for a moment. "Leia would have been devastated, Poe. And it's all right if you are, too."

Poe felt the air shift around them. He wasn't Force-sensitive like Finn, but he felt like something was about to change. When he didn't answer right away, Finn turned to look at him, concern flooding his face. "Poe, are you all right?"

A bitter laugh escaped Poe's lips, and he hated the sound. Taking a deep breath, he set the bitterness aside, because what good could it do now? "I'm fine," he lied. "Exhausted, sore…" He trailed off, leaving _guilty, relieved, scared _off the list.

"No, tell me what's wrong," Finn demanded. Poe was reminded of their conversation on the _Falcon_ when Finn had dressed his wound and demanded something similar. "There's something else bothering you."

"Did the Force tell you that?" Poe asked, and immediately regretted his tone. "I'm sorry, I…"

"No, it didn't," Finn said after a moment. "I know you, Poe. I can tell when you're upset without the Force."

"Of course I'm upset!" Poe exclaimed, and he stood up, an unexpected burst of anxious energy driving him to pace. He was coming down from the high of battle, realizing their losses, with no idea of what the future held. And being so close to Finn but having no idea what he wanted made it all that much harder. "We lost good people out there, Finn. I lost good people—and yet I came back. Every time, I send others to their death and make it back to do it again. It's a good thing it's over, because I don't think I could keep doing this."

Finn scrunched up his face with frustration. "First of all—we're co-generals, pal, so we both led them to the end. And stop being such a martyr, already. I thought you got over that after Crait. The people who died chose to follow you, because you are a brilliant pilot and leader. You saved far more people than you lost, you know that! So what's _really _bothering you?"

Poe stared at him, feeling slightly wild-eyed, the angry response sticking in his throat. Finn wasn't there to get yelled at, though, he didn't deserve it. He was a hero, he'd taken out the lead Star Destroyer, he'd helped them win the battle. Poe sat down on the log again, slumped forward. His injured arm twinged and he sighed. He was so tired.

"It's…Finn, I know this is going to sound awful…but we lost all these people and yet all I can think about is how glad, how thankful I am that I … that I didn't lose you. Out of everyone up there…I couldn't do this without you, and I wouldn't want to."

There, he'd said it. He'd been living with survivor's guilt for years, but this was different. This was a level of selfishness that he was ashamed of. Yet it was true: his profound relief was almost overwhelming. He wanted to pull Finn into his arms and confess everything he'd ever felt, but the quiet voice in his head that held a surprising amount of influence over such things told him no. Not the right time. One confession was probably enough, maybe too much.

Finn was quiet, gazing into the trees before he nodded. "I get it," he said. "I understand. I feel the same way."

"What?" Poe asked in surprise. "You do?" Finn felt the same way…about what? He couldn't possibly know how Poe felt about him, could he? Much less, feel the same way?

"I can't imagine anything worse than losing you out there," Finn continued. "If I'd had to watch your ship go down…I don't think I'd have been able to go on. Because we're in this together, right? You said it before we left, and I'm still holding you to it."

"Together we can do anything," Poe murmured, letting his shoulders sag with relief that Finn understood, yet also with disappointment. Finn didn't feel the same, and didn't suspect anything.

"We have a lot to do now," Finn pointed out. "Together." Poe straightened up; time to set his feelings aside and get back to talking about work. The future. Apparently he wasn't out of a job yet.

"Starting with a victory celebration, and passing ceremonies for those who didn't make it back. Then routing out the remaining First Order ships and troops, building a new planetary coalition to keep peace in the vacuum of power, maybe a trip home…"

He trailed off as the spontaneous idea suddenly took over his mind. He hadn't seen his father for years, and the thought of taking a break on Yavin IV before settling into whatever his life held after the Resistance was appealing. It was exactly what he needed, once things had quieted enough for him to get away. Maybe he'd even take Finn, show him where he'd grown up. Only they were co-generals, how could they both get away? And would Finn even want to go?

"Home," Finn murmured. "I like that idea."

"Your home?" Poe was getting that feeling he sometimes had, the one where he wasn't quite sure what was going on, which usually resulted in a lack of comprehensible thought and something stupid coming out of his mouth. It only happened around Finn.

"I don't have a home," Finn pointed out, his voice completely neutral. "I sort of meant yours."

"Oh." Poe swallowed and wondered if Finn wasn't using the Force to read his mind after all. "You're welcome any time, buddy. It's amazing, you'd love it there, and my dad would…" He was going to say _love you too_ but finished with, "…have so many stories to tell us."

"Thanks. I think I'd like to meet him." They were silent for a moment, Poe trying to figure out what to say or do next that wouldn't embarrass him even more. Finn looked thoughtful, and was smiling to himself, as if he knew something Poe did not. Knowing the Force worked in mysterious ways, he probably did.

"So," Finn started. "That thing you did out there, when we hugged Rey…" He cleared his throat, a rare sign of nerves. "You know, on my neck…"

"Oh," said Poe, and he felt the mortification settle in his chest, that Finn had noticed, maybe even heard him. "Um, sorry? Didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable or anything—"

"You didn't." Finn rushed to reassure him, but Poe kept talking.

"It was sort of a heat of the moment thing," Poe continued, then winced and backtracked. "I mean, more of a joy of the moment thing—impulsive. We survived, we beat the First Order, we hugged. You know."

Finn was eyeing him sideways. "Right. I know."

Poe blew out a long breath, thinking he'd either got off by the skin of his teeth or had made a complete idiot of himself, maybe both. It _had_ been a heat of the moment thing, and ridiculously impulsive. But that was because he hadn't been able to hold back any longer, not after all the other times he'd wanted to lean into Finn, bury his head in Finn's neck, touch his face and press his lips to—

Finn was talking, pulling Poe out of his starry-eyed thoughts.

"Did you mean it?" Finn's tone was more confident now, no longer nervous or unsure, but Poe had no idea what he was talking about. Yavin IV again?

"What do you mean, did I mean what?" Apparently, he'd left his ability to articulate a sentence behind with his X-wing. He was tired, and grieving, and still scared, and yet it was all down to Finn that Poe couldn't seem to wrap his brain around anything coherent and sensible. He'd spent the last year worrying about losing him to the war, had confessed how ridiculously relieved he was that Finn had survived. Yet now that it was over, he was more scared of the future than ever.

"The kiss," Finn said. "Did you mean it—what kisses usually mean," he added.

"Oh." Speechless again, Poe decided he needed some time to himself to recover, but he suspected it would be a long time before he had any. Just because the battle was won didn't mean the war was over yet. "Well, there's different kinds of kisses, you know," he babbled. "And I suppose at the time I was thinking—"

A hand came up to touch his jaw, turned his face away from the trees and toward dark eyes that stared into his soul. A thumb caressed his lips before Finn leaned forward and kissed him, a short, simple kiss that was nevertheless perfect. Finn pulled back, the worried look on his face betraying his seeming confidence. "Did you mean it?" he asked softly, hopefully, and Poe gave up. He couldn't fight it, and he couldn't lie. Not to Finn, not anymore.

"Yes," he whispered. "Yes, I meant it. Did you? Just now?"

"I meant it," Finn told him, leaning his forehead against Poe's. "I wouldn't have done it if I didn't."

"Me too." Poe closed the distance and kissed him again, this time with more feeling. It was a longer kiss, slow and exploratory, full of meaning, and when they stopped, they were both slightly breathless and grinning.

"What the hell just happened?" Poe asked. His heart was racing, but for the first time since he'd gone into battle, it was racing with excitement and joy.

"Something that probably should have happened a while ago," Finn answered in that dry way he had, and Poe laughed out loud.

"You have no idea how long I've thought about it," he told Finn, who shook his head and laughed with him.

"No, I do. Trust me, I really do." They kissed again, and Poe was filled with wonder, that here they were, sitting on a log in the jungle after winning the biggest battle they'd seen. Alive. Together.

"So we're doing this?" Poe asked, thinking back to the first time he'd met this man, when Finn had saved his life, and he had saved Finn. He had known from the moment Finn had said "I need a pilot" that his life would change that day and never be the same, but he had rarely dared to imagine that this would be where it led. It had always seemed too much to hope for, after crashing onto Jakku, losing most of their fleet, rebuilding their struggling Resistance.

People didn't fall in love during war, because they could always lose that one person they loved the most. It seemed selfish, to take the time, to dare to hope for a life together. Moments of happiness were few and far between for everyone.

But they'd won. The greatest battle of the Resistance was over. There would be more, smaller battles with the remnants of the First Order. There would be rebuilding. But the Emperor was dead (again), Kylo Ren was gone, the Sith fleet destroyed, and the galaxy rising up. Maybe it was okay now, to fall in love, to be selfish, to take the time for happiness. To actually live the life he wanted now, instead of always fighting to live that life in the future.

"We're doing this," laughed Finn, and he pulled Poe into an embrace, and another kiss, and the world was perfect for one amazing moment.

"Come on," said Finn, pulling back and standing up. He offered his hand and Poe took it; this time he would never let go. "Let's go find Rey. I have two things to tell her now!"

"What?" Poe asked, confused. "You never told her about—well, about you? The Force?"

"When would I?" Finn asked, walking faster. "I haven't seen her since I told you."

"What's the other thing?" Poe asked.

Finn laughed as he practically dragged Poe along the path back to the celebration. "That I found my pilot."

"Finn." Poe pulled him to a stop on the edge of the main landing area. "You found me a long time ago."

"I know." They gazed into one another's eyes, the silent understanding passing between them that this was something they had both wanted, maybe since the beginning. Poe surged forward and tugged Finn to him with his good hand, kissing him hard, and suddenly they were surrounded by Black Squadron, by Chewie and Rey and BB8 bumping excitedly against his leg. And they laughed and hugged and kissed again as someone whistled and drew them them into the crowd for more embraces, more tears, and so much love.

Through it all, Poe stayed close by Finn's side. Because that was where he needed to be, where he wanted to be, where he would stay forever. Truly together in every sense of the word, they could do anything.

* * *

Author's Note

The end! I hope this felt true to the rest of the story, something that could have happened and hopefully will at some point between Finn and Poe. I toyed with the idea of Rey running up and interrupting them, but it didn't feel right since this was their moment, their story. But don't be surprised if she spoils it in different story, as I've already started another! I realized when I was almost finished with this that it felt very familiar, like something from another SW movie. And I had a good laugh at myself, but just went with it, since there's so many parallels between the two couples already, why not another? Thank you so much for reading this story, I appreciate all the comments!


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